Dating Expectations – When To Cool Your Heels
The beginning of a new romance is thrilling and a lot of fun, but quite often an order of expectation comes into play. It’s natural to wonder about the status of your relationship and how quickly (or slowly) it’s all coming along. New events can trigger thoughts about said status – the first kiss, the first time you have sex with your new partner, introduction to family and friends, moving in together etc. This order of expectation relates to personal standards and values, as well as what an individual is used to after spending time in the dating scene. The wish to ‘move things along’ can become overwhelming if it’s not going at the desired pace.
The important thing is to be cool! As the old adage goes: Don’t push the river. Go with the flow. Don’t expect too much of a new relationship, because placing great expectations on it can do more harm than good. Being too eager to move to the next stage can be misinterpreted as being unhappy with the dynamics of your relationship. On a similar note, you shouldn’t make a habit of idealizing your current partner – not only will it make them appear more or less desirable than they really are, but this kind of behavior can breed insecurities that could jeopardize the course of the relationship.
Take your time and enjoy it. It may take you to new and exciting places!
Reference: MyBrotha
Reference: MentalHelp.net
June 6th, 2007 at 2:50 pm
There are more people on dating sites over 35.. it’s THE place to meet.
I remember when it wasn’t common and I met my husband who was half a world away and my kids thought he was surely an axe murderer. How times have changed. And now we are together for 13 years. In dating you should just be yourself and true to the one that your dating. Good Luck!
June 7th, 2007 at 2:32 am
Great advice - if only it was as simple to say as to adhere to! I think most of us have been guilty of wanting to move too quickly or placing great expectations on someone. After scaring a few guys off, I was just lucky to marry someone who moved as quickly as I did!